Ayzoe Brad Munyaka Ist
The heavy burden slows me down… Beads of sweat roll down my face and drips from my chin. I lay down my burden and stretch my back, by the sound of my bones creaking I realize that my body cannot take it anymore. I look down at my hands which were once soft, tender… my hands… which I once used to oil her body with, massage her, calm and comfort her. Now it seems more course than sand paper, it seems like a mere stroke of my hand would scratch off her skin and cause her agony. I try to imagine the possibility of me touching her soft chocolate skin again and it’s not because she needs me to comfort her. No. But rather, the belief that for just a moment that brief moment when my fingers will rub on her skin… all the stones I carry would be lifted off and overwhelming peace would finally rest in my heart.
I decide to stroll down the path and have a refreshing drink from the village well. I lift up the bucket and cup my hands so that I could drink the water from my course hand. I stop. Frozen in the moment, I see my reflection on the surface of the water. Could that person really be me? I wipe of the sweat and check myself out again. My face, my face which was once radiant. My smile, my smile which was once boyish and my eyes, my eyes which once was filled with exuberating confidence was no more. I jerk backwards repulsively… No that could not really be me. My skin greasy, eyes weary, face creepy… No that is definitely not me! My heart is now thumping on my chest… She definitely cannot see me like this…
Picking up my burden, I continue with my journey home… to her. My heart thumps harder and it is definitely not only because of the heavy burden. I realize I both yearn and dread seeing her… I see our home, however, I feel like it is no longer our home and I am just an intruder. Shaking off all the negativity in me, I make the final resolution that she should see me for who I am or rather who I have become! A chill runs through my spine as I think of how she would react. She won’t love this, me anymore. I see a familiar face peeking through the window as I approach the house. Before I knock the door, she appears…
She looks so dreamy, her hair curled up, eyes so large and bright despite being awake for the whole night… She looks just how I left her, overwhelmingly beautiful. She opens up her arms to receive me and guilt nearly makes me crumple down. I decide to let down my burden and tell her of my misdeed. Tell her of how I am lucky to have her and how stupid I was to accept another woman’s companionship. Tell her that she definitely deserves better than me and if she is to leave me, I will understand. Tell her that am sorry I am not the man I was, nor was to be. Tell her she is the abstract of hope and happiness, she is a beautiful butterfly and I should no longer suffocate her in my course and greasy hands!
She looks deep into my eyes and for a brief moment, I see the brightness that ever shone in her eyes dim slightly. She still opens up her arms and tells me to let her hold me. I hesitate for a while then dive in to her embrace. Overwhelming peace wash in like the waves of the Indian Ocean and replaces the heavy burden in my heart. My skin softens and revitalises as she presses me closer to her bosom. My face radiates brightly as my eyes restore their former glory. She tilts her head so she could whisper something to my ear. “We will get through this as we always do, together.”
Ayzoe Brad Munyaka Ist
“Its All In The Name.”